Thursday, September 22, 2011

75 REASONS THE DJ HATES YOU.

1. The song you are requesting is being played.
2. You ask for a song that nobody will dance to.
3. You tell the DJ he sucks just because he won't play your song.
4. The only songs you know are line dances.
5. You want to hear every song by Britney Spears and Lady Gaga.
6. You complain that no one likes the song when the dance floor is full.
7. You think reserving a table turns the DJ into your own jukebox.
8. You ask to sing on the microphone like it's karaoke night.
9. You want to hear your song next or you're leaving.
10. You declare that you just got to the club so the DJ should play all the hits just for you.
11. Your sad face does not move the DJ into feeling sorry for you and playing your request.
12. You have no concept that the DJ accepts tips.
13. You come to the booth and ask the DJ if he is the DJ.
14. You ask the DJ if he plays any good music.
15. Your requests aren't any where near the format the DJ plays.
16. You demand to hear your song because you are about to leave.
17. When we say we dont play a genre, you ask for more of that genre.
18. You keep asking what song is next.
19. You want to look at every song we have.
20. You don't dance to your request, then ask for more.
21. You think the dance floor is a portrait studio.
22. You make silly poses at the DJ like you are DJing.
23. You are part of a bachelorette party.
24. You grab or touch equipment while the DJ is playing.
25. You are so drunk you think the DJ booth is the bar.
26. You stay by the DJ booth hoping to pick up women.
27. You keep trying to tell the DJ your life story while we are mixing.
28. You think you know what everyone wants to hear.
29. You ask for a song to be played again 5 minutes after hearing it.
30. You say you know the owner/manager in an attempt to get a song played.
31. You ask for the same song everytime you are there.
32. You take pictures of the DJ without warning him of the flash.
33. You're so drunk you keep falling into the DJ booth.
34. You spill a drink on the DJ equipment.
35. You ask that the volume be turned down.
36. You keep trying to get the DJ to dance with you.
37. You tell the DJ what songs go together that don't go together.
38. You stand by the DJ and stare awkwardly.
39. You think it's cool to just stand on the dancefloor and text.
40. You have to talk louder than the music by the DJ booth.
41. You think the DJ booth is a coat check.
42. You offer to tip but never do.
43. You run ladies off the dance floor.
44. You wear so much cologne/perfume the DJ's eyes water.
45. You ask us to play songs off your phone or download them.
46. You keep asking for a shout out all night long.
47. You want us to play a song you made.
48. You act like the DJ is your boyfriend when he is not.
49. You try to sing or hum the song you want to hear.
50. Instead of asking for a song you stick a phone in our face to show us.
51. You don't know the song just the number on the CD.
52. You get all of your friends to ask for the same song that we won't play.
53. You interrupt the DJ to get him to take your picture.
54. Your idea of good music isn't.
55. You think old school means 5 years ago.
56. You ask when do we start to playing something crunk.
57. When you hear a slow jam you think it's a signal to hump women like a dog.
58. If it isn't hip hop you just call it techno.
59. You keep asking for requests after the club closes.
60. You know the DJ and text him requests to get you in the door.
61. You know the DJ is working and you call over and over expecting an answer.
62. You ask for a song and stay at the booth until the DJ plays it.
63. You fart by the DJ booth.
64. You want something faster but are requesting something slower.
65. You keep trying to fist bump and high five the DJ.
66. You say the other DJ always plays your song when there is no other DJ.
67. You act worse than a 5 year old in the club.
68. You say you are spending a ton of money and we should play your songs regardless.
69. You want an in-depth explanation on how the equipment works.
70. Your requests are more like demands.
71. You vomit in or around the DJ booth.
72. You tell the DJ how bad the song playing is, then request an even worse one.
73. You ask the DJ to play something with a beat.
74. You threaten to get the manager to make you play a song.
75. Your song was played but you want it again because you were in the bathroom.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Red Rover!


While riding yesterday, it occurred to me how expensive it is to run a kid's birthday party these days. Bouncy castles are $300 touch...add cake, ice cream, a clown and goody bags and you can easily run up a $500 bill.
Here's some freeky alternatives.

Let go the H2O...a sprinkler party! Throw down beach towels as a picnic place...everyone suits up to limbo and water balloon fight. Freezies and Beach Boys music! Google the instructions to make a pinata as a project to do with the birthday boy or girl before the party...try a three legged race!

Get 20-30 balloons at the dollar store...decorate! Get sidewalk chalk and have a picture party!

A photo scavenger hunt with an inkjet scrapbooking collage at the end (shoot a silly face, a picture of a thumb, something juicy, the dog)

Think about when you were a kid...Red Rover Red Rover...won't you come over?

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Rules

Rule #1. Do not date a girl you meet in the bar. She drinks too much.

Rule #2. Do not date a hair stylist. (Thanks Deane...)

Rule #3. Do not date her if she has not been single.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Bin Laden: The Story Changed


When Steve first posted "Osama Bin Laden is Dead", I wasn't sure if he was joking or not...he's like that. So the investigative reporter in me immediately googled it to see what the internet was saying at that moment. It confirmed what Hurricane said, Osama was dead. He'd been dead a week and Osama was about to confirm it by DNA.
I know I wasn't dreaming and was not the only one who heard or saw the original reports...they said "LAST WEEK"... here is the text, copied from the other night, as reported by The Associated Press:

The number of links to any information regarding a seven day delay or the method of his demise in the reporting of Bin Laden's death is rapidly shrinking...or have been edited from their original versions to a boilerplate version of the story with no mention of him being killed a week earlier...
one example...the Denver Post: Original Article (Google Cache) vs Current Link
here's more...


Sources: Osama bin Laden was Killed Last Week in Pakistan | KSTP ...

1 May 2011 ... Two senior counterterrorism officials confirmed that bin Laden was killed in Pakistan last week. One said bin Laden was killed in a ground ...
kstp.com/news/stories/S2091001.shtml?cat=1 -


Northwest Herald | Source: bin Laden killed in Pakistan

1 May 2011 ... Two senior counterterrorism officials confirmed that bin Laden was killed in Pakistan last week. One said bin Laden was killed in a ground ...
www.nwherald.com/2011/05/...bin-laden-killed-in-pakistan/as071hn/


Osama bin Laden dead - Telegraph

2 May 2011 ... Two senior counterterrorism officials confirmed that bin Laden was killed in Pakistan last week. One said bin Laden was killed in a ground ...
www.telegraph.co.uk/news/.../Osama-bin-Laden-dead.html


Report: Osama Bin Laden killed

1 May 2011 ... Two senior counterterrorism officials confirmed that bin Laden was killed in Pakistan last week. One said bin Laden was killed in a ground ...
www.fox11online.com/dpp/.../Report%3A-Osama-Bin-Laden-killed - Cached

Osama bin Laden is dead - The Daily Telegraph

2 May 2011 ... Two senior counter terrorism officials confirmed that bin Laden was killed in Pakistan last week, AP reported. One said bin Laden was killed ...
www.dailytelegraph.com.au/...bin-laden.../story-e6freuy9-1226048340655


Al-Qaida leader Osama bin Laden has been killed - The Denver Post

1 May 2011 ... Two senior counterterrorism officials confirmed that bin Laden was killed in Pakistan last week. One said bin Laden was killed in a ground ...
www.denverpost.com/recommended/ci_17971598 - United States - Cached


Just sayin is all...

Thank You Canada


Thank You, Canada, for voting. I don't care who you voted for.
I DO care who you did not vote for.
Thank You, for sending the treasonous Bloc Quebecois a clear message that they are no longer welcome in our house, our home, our Canada.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Stephen Harper breaks election rules, campaigns on radio on election day - Canada Canada Headlines | Examiner.com

‎"It is certain that I will vote, and I encourage all other people to vote, and I encourage people to do the same as me and vote Conservative." -Stephen Harper, May 2, 2011 on CKNW Vancouver

Sections 480 to 499 of the Canada Elections Act list the offence provisions, categorized according to whether intent is required, and the burden of proof required to prosecute them. Offences include election advertising during the blackout period.
If a judge finds a person guilty of an offence, the person may receive a fine or a period of imprisonment, or both. Under section 501 of the Act, the Court may also impose additional penalties, such as with respect to certain offences, the deregistration of a party and liquidation of its assets, and the liquidation of the assets of the party's registered associations.

Stephen Harper breaks election rules, campaigns on radio on election day - Canada Canada Headlines | Examiner.com

wag the dog QSS - Stagevu: Your View

wag the dog QSS - Stagevu: Your View